My mom...

...she's a funny, undiagnosed chemically imbalanced woman...yet somehow a hypochondriac also. She'll let a doctor prescribe every other drug in the world except the ones she really needs to control that chemical imbalance thing she's got going on.

No joke, one day I was in Texas at her house - she called me in from the other room to see a commercial on tv, proclaiming "I have that, I need that!" The commercial was for restless leg syndrome and a lovely pill you can take to resolve the issue. The drug companies must know my mom by reputation and need a new boat/car/house/small island/insert-other-luxury-item-here, why else would they put drug ads on tv now.

Anyway - I just got an email from her. "Your dad got the package you mailed him and says thanks for the stuff - he loves the hat." History - since we're in France, we drove up and watched the Tour de France come through (because my husband is an avid, obsessive, cyclist.) Prior to the riders coming through there are all these lovely sponsors that tour through and throw samples/goodies/trinkets-n-trash at you. We had so many of these goodies that we decided to divide them up and send them to our families back home, along with a cute little note with pictures. I sent one to my in-laws, my brother, my dad, and my mom (they're divorced.) Knowing my mom well enough, and knowing the contents of the package, I read clearly between the lines of her simple little sentence above. What she politely (?) left out was the "WHERE'S MINE!! You love you dad more than me don't you!! After all I do for you and all the sacrafices I've made WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH!"