Too Long...

How to tell that my husband has lived in France too long...he's now peeing on the side of the road with no shame what so ever...yes, that's Sparky back there in the tree...

The grocery store effect Part 1 & 2

Part 1
See, the way things are done down here in the South of France are just a little bit different. Definately different than in the US, but apparently different than Amsterdam, Munich, Barcelona, of course London, Glasgow...it's almost as if we are living in a 3rd world country down here in the South of France - some of their ways are so archaic.

We recently took a trip to Glasgow, Scotland. Upon arriving at the airport, we picked up our rental car and began our drive South to the apartment we had rented for the week. We didn't want to get caught in a small Scottish town without a grocery store so we stopped at one outside of Glasgow (see Part 2).

It was an ASDA Wal-Mart grocery store. A real grocery store.
We were both in awe walking through this real grocery store. Sure we had seen grocery stores like this in any of the above mentioned cities we had visited before, but it's always the same reaction upon entering. It's like "wow, i forgot what a real grocery store was like, this is so cool" It's hard to explain the difference really...but French grocery stores are just...different...the food is odd, the packaging makes no sense, the layout of the store makes no sense (baby diapers by the meat department, um, OK).

Part 2 - food hording.
I realize I now experience this anytime we travel...anywhere. I'll admit, we're both kind of picky eaters, not experimental with our food - especially the meats. We even went to Germany and didn't eat a single sausage or bratworst, went to China and didn't eat Chinese food. Whatever, it's who we are and we're ok with that, we don't complain to others about it we simply learn how to adjust. See we're both about a step away from being vegeterians - just without the strong moral conviction that seems to go with it. Sparky is a competitive cyclist so he relies on a low fat, high carb diet. I am completely grossed out by what all is done/eaten on animals - if it weren't for the fact that I'm a Texan and crave BBQ I could probably make it as a vegeterian (I simply just don't think about what meat BBQ is made of, same with lunch meat, and I'm OK). But you would think that no matter where we went it would be easy to stay away from odd animal parts as your only meal - not in Europe. Sometimes it's really hard to just find a sandwich or someone willing to make just plain pasta with no sauce or butter or oil (agast! they always look at us like, why bother, why eat if you don't have oil on it).

So, having been caught in these 'can't find anything to eat' situations several times when we first moved here, I feel I try to hord good food when I find it as we travel. Silly, I know, but I can't seem to get over it.

Pushing you over the edge

I have come to realize there are 4 phrases that I have heard from the French that will push me over the edge and drive me to a LePoste episode...(see previous post "Postal vs. LePoste"

1. When you are on the phone with a French person and you are trying your best to speak French to them, when you say something they don't understand they pause...then say "Ello?" as if they can't hear you...as if the phone signal is cutting out...always the same...you speak, long pause..."Ello?"

2. Generally the long pause and "Ello?" is followed by "Je ne comprend pas" (I don't understand) and the phone being hung up. I don't understand you so I want nothing else to do with you and I'm hanging up now.

3. "Ne existe pas" It doesn't exist, if a French person doesn't know/have/care to walk to the back to get what you are asking for they throw this little golden nugget at you.

4. And my all time favourite, the one that is closest to pushing me over the edge..."C'est impossible" it's impossible. You are asking me to do something I don't want to do "c'est impossible", you are speaking to me about, whatever, I don't care, why are you speaking to me in the first place "c'est impossible" I don't know how to do what you are asking and instead of asking any one of the other French coworkers I have "c'est impossible." I know that i could back my car up those 10 feet and let you pass but I don't want to so it is "c'est impossible" for me to back up.